focus

Why do I feel like this God? Anxious, angry - what is this feeling? I remember it from when I was young especially. Forgotten. I’m feeling forgotten. Like no one cares. That’s a rough feeling for me. The people I love the most, the people I care for the most, forgetting me. Or worse - remembering me and not caring. Is that why I care so much? Too much? Because I know what it feels like to feel forgotten, uncared for, unloved?

“You’re focusing too much on other people.”

I need to be focused on you. You alone. Why do I lose my focus so quickly? Why do I become so distracted?

“Know me more. Love me more. The further you come into my love, the less distractions you’ll find.”

The more things I’ll have to leave behind… people I’ll have to leave behind.

“You won’t leave people behind, but you’re right you won’t connect with them the same way you do now.”

How will I connect with them?

“You’ll love them better.”

Will they love me better?

“Not always, but you’ll love me better. So it won’t matter as much. When everything feels unfocused and you’re frazzled, it’s because you’re not focusing on Me. I will be your calm in the storm. When your head feels chaotic - I will bring you peace of mind. When your heart starts to pound I will hug you until the pace matches mine. When your mind races, I’ll turn you around and we will take a walk in my garden. Can you smell the dew drops? Can you feel them on our toes? Can you taste the air in my presence? My sweet aroma dripping into your every pore. I will fill you to the brim if you’ll only slow down with me.”

I’ll let you set the pace, Lord. Let me stay by your side.